It’s Black Friday. The best day of the year! It’s the day we go and possibly die to get a TV. We might save $1500 on a Samsung 75″ 4K UHD HDR QLED Tizen Smart TV. Or we might die trying. To die for a TV is the ultimate glory.
Actually, no it isn’t. It’s not a great way to go. Die a hero. Not like this…
Watching the brawl videos, it’s tough to say what your best strategy is. Do you take the shopping cart, so you can load up more stuff? Or to you run in and grab what you can? Mean and lean. There are pros and cons to both approaches.
But now people are shooting guns in the Black Friday melees. NOT COOL! This holiday is about good old fashioned trampling and punching and yelling. Call me conservative, but I say stick to the basics.
What about staying home and doing it on the computer?
Online Black Friday shopping is another possibility. There are still good deals to be had, from the comfort of your couch. But you miss out on the physicality.
The Amazon workers are saying ‘Screw that! Get to the mall! Go fight for your deals like good honest citizens!’ Today the ‘Everything Store’ saw workers walk out in protest of inhumane working conditions.
The GMB reported last year that ambulances were called to Amazon warehouses in an incredible 600 times in the last three years for incidents including electric shocks, exhaustion, chest pains, major trauma — and on three occasions even pregnancy-related issues. “At a similar sized supermarket distribution warehouse a few miles away, there were just eight call outs during the same period,” the GMB said at the time.
Sounds pretty bad. The good news for them is that robots can do their jobs better and with less complaining. Problem solved.
And robots can do our jobs better, too. Soon robots will not only replace Amazon warehouse workers, but we will also be able to send our own robots out to the store to get things for us. We’ll be able to watch from home while our robots do the fighting for us. As we learned from Battlebots, it’s the low-profile, wedge shaped robots that dominate. They can handle impact from above, and don’t have many exposed moving parts that, although they may look to be formidable or at least useful weapons, can be exploited. These ‘door-stop’ shaped machines can sneak their way under more upright competitors, eventually flipping them on their backs and pushing them into the spinning sawblades, or the fire pits. And this happens EVEN THOUGH an upright, ‘walking’ robots gets to add an up to 50% bonus in overall weight!
Simplicity is a big advantage! In life and on Black Friday.
But when your robot dies, horribly, brutally, clutching the TV set that should have been yours, you’ll be sad.