Last week the FDA dropped the bombshell on us that their latest studies had discovered that non-dairy ‘milks’ are not actually ‘milk.’ Many people are still reeling.
This week they are taking a look at meat. OH NO!
There are many meat substitutes out there. Some people want to eat only meat. Some people want to eat none. Some people don’t wan’t to kill stuff. OR WHATEVER! THEY HAVE THEIR REASONS! So instead of real meat, they choose fake meat. No big deal, right?
No so fast!
Apparently, the validity of meat substitutes is now up for debate. You never know what the FDA will come up with. If we’ve learned anything from recent history, it could be anything! Vegans and vegetarians are on the edges of their seats waiting for the verdict.
Veg Meat: There are so many questions that need answering
Which fake meat is best? Is it real? Is it healthy? Is it meat? And what hidden effects is it having on how we make decisions?
An article put out this week examines a few:
Tofu/Tempeh – Two old timers in the faux-meat game. Made from soybeans. As we know, soy is one of the biggest GMO crops, and eating it releases massive amounts of estrogen into your system. This isn’t the best hormone to OD on, especially for men. How your body reacts to this meat alternative could easily trick you into voting for the wrong guy by accident.
Seitan – This meat substitute is made from gluten, and we all know how bad that is. In addition to the various physical ailments it can cause you, eating gluten (or gluten products such as this one) can easily cause you to crack under the pressure of the polling station and make you trip up and vote for the wrong guy.
Quorn – This newcomer to the ‘meat’ scene is made from fungus. Sound good? Hey, maybe better than soy. But be warned, a fungus can take over your brain and make you do things you might later regret, like voting for the wrong guy. You’ve seen what it does to ants. Don’t let this happen to you!
Jackfruit – Fruit…? But it looks like pulled pork! Remember what we learned from the milk debacle. LOOKS AREN’T EVERYTHING! Just because it’s white and wet doesn’t mean it’s milk! Just because it’s stringy and covered in sauce doesn’t mean it’s pulled pork! It might be fine. But look what replacing meat with fruit did to Steve Jobs. On a mixed diet he made some OK computers. When he switched to fruit only, he lost it and tricked everyone in to buying these crappy portable telephones so they could waste their lives.
3d Printed Meat – The holy grail of meat alternatives. Literally nothing needs to die. But it’s still too soon to tell how it affects our health and brains. (Or is it? Some rumors claim that printed meat is secretly more widely served than we think… And look at what’s happening in the world! Observing people’s actions certainly supports the rumor!)
There are Pros and Cons to every choice. WHAT DO I DO?
These are just the early findings. We don’t yet know what the FDA’s verdict will be. But it’s worth noting: IF YOU’RE DELVING INTO THE WORLD OF FAKE MEAT, YOU’RE TAKING YOUR LIFE INTO YOUR HANDS. I CLAIM NO RESPONSIBILITY SO DON’T EVEN TRY SUING ME!
That being said, based on this research, it’s probably best to go with Jackfruit. (Or grass-fed, grass-finished, free-range, hormone/antibiotic free meat. From animals.) Then you don’t need to worry as much about putting the wrong President, Prime-Minister, Senator, Mayor, Councillor, School Board Trustee, or Sheriff into office.
OR YOU CAN JUST DO WHATEVER YOU WANT! IT’S A (SOMEWHAT) FREE COUNTRY!