Facts can be slippery creatures.
Especially now. We’ve already learned about sneaky tactics to media is using to pull the wool over your eyes.
But this fact is indisputable:
I might be responsible for up to 97% of your happiness!
There’s basically no way to argue with that! You can’t deny it. There’s nothing you can say!
THE FACTS ARE THE FACTS.
That’s just the thing about the truth. Just look it up in the dictionary if you’re not sure. (Dictionaries don’t lie, either. Neither does Wikipedia!)
97% not good enough for you! Here’s how to make it higher!
Follow these steps:
- Go on instagram and press ‘like.’
- Go on facebook and press ‘share.’
- Go on twitter and press ‘retweet.’ And then add some clever commentary.
- Get the t-shirt! Not only is it super-soft 100% Organic cotton, so you feel sexier than ever when you wear it around, but every time you look down at the front of the shirt, you’ll be happy. And not only that, but you’ll get joy from the radiant smiles on the faces of everyone that walks by!
It’s called spreading the love!
And it still works.
Plus, it’s scientifically proven. Forget about the addictive dopamine hits. They SUCK!
GO ALL THE WAY WITH OXYTOCIN! IT’S THE BEST!
You’ll live longer, feel better, get more phone numbers, and walk around with your head in the clouds.